Tips to Make Co-Parenting Easier

Negotiating custody arrangements during a divorce can be a major point of contention between spouses, particularly because child custody has often meant that one parent is given the majority of responsibility for the children while the other is given limited involvement as a non-custodial parent.  However, in recent years more and more people are choosing to share custody in an effort to ensure that both parents get to raise the children.

What are some tips to make co-parenting easier?

Every family is different and there is no perfect arrangement, but the following tips may help make co-parenting easier for both parents and children:

• Connect with One Another – With the help of technology it is becoming easier for families to keep in touch on a daily basis.  Check in each day by phone, Facetime, or texts and stay present and involved in each child’s everyday life.
• Live Close By – If possible, living close by will allow children the freedom to see each parent at any time.  It also cuts back on the frustration of having to pack up and travel often, thus forcing you to spend a majority of your custody time in a vehicle.
• Create a Schedule – As much as possible, create a schedule and stick to it.  Children need stability and knowing what to expect each day can help maintain trust.
• Have Flexibility – When plans change, be willing to adjust.  If the parents are supportive of each other, the children will not feel caught in the middle.

Common issues with co parenting

Every relationship will have its challenges. Here are some common issues with co-parenting and ideas for dealing with them:

• Co parenting with a narcissist – Sometimes one parent has an inflated sense of importance or constant need for attention which can make every parenting decision seem like a struggle. One way to control this situation is to have a legal parenting plan in place.
• Co parenting with no communication – One parent may fail to communicate at all or just not as often as needed for the child.  When this happens, be cooperative and reasonable with the other parent and act within your child’s best interest.
• Schedule changes – When a planned schedule changes, it can break the regular contact your child needs with both parents to make co parenting effective. First discuss with your co-parent, then formally modify your parenting plan so everyone is in agreement.
• Alienation – When one parent talks badly about the other parent or uses children to hurt you could cause a divide in the common purpose of parenting together. Try to maintain a relationship with your child and rebuild a parent-child bond. Attend activities and stay involved. If your efforts are ignored, consider legal counsel.

For parents in Delaware County Pennsylvania and the surrounding area, the child custody attorneys at Varga Law Offices are dedicated to helping families through the difficult divorce process.  Please contact our office today for a confidential consultation.